Faith Through the Journey

Being a woman in today’s world can be wonderful, for there are many opportunities available to women now that were not open just a few years ago. Even at my age, women have had choices that were unheard of a generation ago. I was blessed with opportunities and a wonderful husband who was 100% supportive of my decisions. He’s always told me I’m the smartest person he knows–who would not LOVE to hear that?? We came to the decision–together–that when we had children, I would stay home with them. Being the one who had huge input into the lives of my children on an almost 24/7 basis was one of the greatest privileges of my life. I was there for their first smiles, their first steps, teaching them to read, potty training (now that wasn’t so glorious!), and all of the other moments that comprised their first years. Yes, there were moments that I thought I would NEVER get off the floor, playing endless games of Chutes and Ladders and Candy Land, playing with dolls or Lincoln Logs. Yet, there were rewarding moments that made up for some of the more ordinary, unglamorous ones. In the world of stay-at-home moms, there isn’t a glass ceiling or rivalry for a coveted position. My privileged position was mine alone, having given birth to my three amazing children and deciding along with my husband that mine was the face they would see primarily on a daily basis. With my multitude of health issues, holding down a full time job outside our home would have been nearly impossible. Our decisions were made on that basis as well, and the sacrifices we made were well worth it.

All of that being said, I am SO glad I didn’t have to try to compete with other women in the workplace. The very ugly truth about women is that they are, more often than not, HORRIBLE to each other. For that reason, I have purposely stayed away from women’s groups of any kind. As every woman knows, from the moment we as little girls begin to relate to one another, there is ALWAYS competition to be the best friend, the most popular, the prettiest, the one with the cutest clothes or the best toys, and the only thing that changes as we get older is the things about which we are competitive. If three women are friends, you can almost be sure that when one of the three isn’t present, the other two will be talking about her. And the other dirty little secret about women is that we cannot get what we want through brute force, so we do it by manipulating people, circumstances, whatever we have to in order to get our way. That started with Eve in the Garden of Eden!

We as women have choices about our roles, our opportunities, and most of all, who we will be as women of character. Will we be bound by the natural rivalries we as women fall into, or will we rise above that? Will we choose to be defined by our own choices about how we relate to one another? Is it possible to create trusting relationships with other women that will not be compromised when the temptation comes to gossip? And, more importantly, will we make the conscious choice NOT to manipulate people or circumstances for our own purposes?

The only way to truly break out of this cycle is to be transformed from the inside out, through the saving, TRANSFORMING power of Jesus Christ. The base things about us express our human nature, and the only way for that to change is to be made new. Paul wrote in II Corinthans 5:17: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he (she) is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” Even when the “new” has come, we will still be tempted to fall back into those “old” patterns of relationships. It must be a decision in order to win that battle within ourselves. The love of Jesus Christ being shed abroad in our hearts is the power that makes it possible to break those patterns of behavior. The joys of being a woman who has been changed from the inside out by the power of Christ’s love are immeasurable. God didn’t make a mistake when He created women the way He did, for when we are controlled by His Holy Spirit, we are truly beautiful from the inside out!